A Love Letter

You know something about home?
Home is a place, but not just physical
Home is a place, spiritual
It is the presence that is felt when you enter into that place

Like when I enter into you
You are never changing
No matter where I go when I leave
You are still the same
No matter how I have changed when I get back
You are never changing
No matter how many rocks I threw at you when I was angry
You kept me warm all the same
No matter how much I neglected you
You are never changing
No matter how many times I had to say sorry
You forgave me again and again

Home is the strength of familiarity that can receive you time and time again
Like a mother’s embrace, it’s always there
But who am I to take advantage again and again?
Knowing that no matter what you will be there
Like the giving tree you give and give again and again
Like that stupid boy I come back and take more and more to squander every other where

So this time I will stay
I won’t go away
I will replace and rebuild what I took away
I won’t go away
I will dwell in the place where my spirit holds sway
I won’t go away
I have been away long enough to learn that there is nothing out there for me anyway
Because you stayed, I will never again go away

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The Foolish Finger

Life is so confusing
When flawed logic you are using

In an illusion constantly fooling
Driving you to your constant judging

Closer and closer to your awakening
When you realize that on you was the jesting

Behind your back they all were laughing
Pointing at you while you are spinning

Flailing and grabbing and crying and screaming
Reaching for that which was never existing

Then one day you come to the realization
That all you had was given in contention

The assertion of some one else’s ability to keep you in their jurisdiction
And slowly as the threads loosen
You are naked and without self-possession

And this all may have been avoided
If your own mind you had not evaded

So before you assign yourself the arbiter
Take some time to self discover

Because the foolish finger you are pointing
At you one day it will be aiming

A Strange new land

(Listen)
Navigating through these emotions is so consuming
My emotions betray me each and every time
Whenever it is not good for me I am falling
Whenever it’s good for me I am running

When the good feelings come then the confusion
When the bad feelings come then the familiarity
When will my mind leave behind this confusion?
And enter into a realm of clarity

So here I go into the unknown
Ignoring all that I used to trust
Walking with strangers in a new town
Despite all my fear because I know that I must

This maze is weird and scary
It is a strange and new adventure at best
All new definitions must be assigned
To every creature a new name at realities behest

From now on logic must take hold
To lead emotion in the way that it should go
To ensure I am not caught in another emotional stronghold
To ensure the direction of truth is the way that I go

So welcome new creatures and beams of light
Away with you specters and beasts of contrite
Now animated I go away from stagnant death
Bravely walking in this new journey called life

Keeping The Door Open

It takes a village to raise a family. Remember to give thanks to all those neighbors and friends who help you to stay sane as a single parent. Show your appreciation as often as you can.

RootedbyTheBlended

keep
My Background
I was raised by both of my parents, but my mom was the heart-beat of our home. She cooked, cleaned, and was always available to anyone who needed her.
I don’t believe I ever heard my mom complain. She was a woman who just catered to the family. Dinner was at 6:30 everyday. Not just during the weekdays- everyday! My mother was able to keep this schedule because she worked part-time. My dad was the soul provider for our house, which made our mom available for us- whenever we needed her. One thing about my parents – they both believed that our front door should stay open- literally. Our friends or anyone who stopped by our house during dinner time was always welcome to stay. Back then, I thought every mom was just like her.
Two Different Households
It wasn’t until I met my best friend Patrick that…

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She got to you first

Have you ever met a great guy being done wrong by another girl. You respectfully stand by and watch while she ruins everything you wish that was yours and you can say nothing because he would never see you the way that you want him to unless he makes the conclusion himself?

 

She got to you before I did

 

You are gentle and sweet

I am tender and soft

She got to your first

You went from gentle to rough

You went from sweet to tart

I noticed your true self, but by then your walls were up

Now all you see is she

Even though it is me that stands here

She got to you first

 

You are loving and responsible

I have treasures that need guarding

She got to you first

You went from loving to afraid

You went from responsible to indifferent

I noticed your true self, but by then your walls were up

Now all you see is she

Even though it is me that stands here

She got to you first

 

Why is life so cruel?

My heart searched for you

My soul yearned for you

And now your soul is lost

She ripped out your eyes

Just before I arrived to be seen. . .

 

Now I have to decide

Do I try to restore your site?

Or do I count you a loss?

My chance once again stayed .

Postponed, by that putrid she devil

The Girl With the Beautiful Smile

There is a girl who sits next to me, she has a beautiful smile

Even in spite of a tremendous trauma, she has a beautiful smile

An anonymous attacker violated her, and still she has a beautiful smile

She smiles and laughs with pretty bright whites, such a beautiful smile

I can’t help but to wonder what goes on, behind that beautiful smile

Does she hurt, does she cry, does she struggle, and does she fight, behind that beautiful smile?

That pretty girl reminds me of me, but her smile is much better practiced

My pain does not hide so well behind a beautiful smile

In fact most some times ask me where it is that I have hidden, my beautiful smile

I often am offended when it is requested that I show my beautiful smile

And yet this girl who sits next to me in spite of her pain does not need to be asked to show her beautiful smile

She means something deep to me with her cheerful laughter and a persistently shining smile

I see fortitude, strength, love, and purity within her beautiful smile

All those characters say to me, they would like to be more obviously me, within my beautiful smile

So the girl who sits next to me has inspired me with her beautiful smile

She has shown me that where hurt exists, good things fight on and purity can win, if you share your beautiful smile